According to Hallmark, love is in the air (hear that? Love, not kisses, are in the air!)
Women, in particular, take a variety of positions on the testy topic of Valentine's Day. Some find it exasperating, taking the position that it's an overly-commercialism holiday destined to make singles miserable. Others are petulant or contemptuous, dealing out sarcastic comments and acerbic scorn. And some women are hopeful for future relationships. But what does Valentine's Day really do? It's supposed to give people a chance to express love and appreciation to people they care about.
I agree that it's Valentine's Day is over-commercialized. And I wouldn't even complain if someone showed up here (randomly) with flowers, chocolates etc. I don't think people should
need a day to be nice to people they love, but since it's been designated as a day for couples, everyone should make the best of it.
People that are single on Valentine's day tend to lament that fact, and wish for some sort of relationship. However, there are many married couples out there who will happily point out that single people don't need to live with someone else's annoying quirks, messy habits, or irritating family members. In rebuttal we offer arguments such as: if you died someone would actually notice; if you're sick, there's someone to cook for you (or at least buy you chicken soup); and there's always someone who's legally required to be there for you.
So yes, sometimes married people envy the freedom and carefree days that singles enjoy. And sometimes single people envy the stability and comfort offered by the long-term relationships. And yes, as Christie (2006) points out, singles would switch with them in a second, but it's doubtful if they would actually switch with us. So the grass really is greener on the other side of the fence - maybe not all the time (such as when you have a really attentive husband, or a good date, for married types and single types respectively), but at least once in a while.
So what's the point? Well, married or single, for better or worse, Valentine's Day exists in all of it's hallmark glory and we should make the best of it. Tell someone (anyone) that you appreciate them and you care about them. Be specific, and maybe give them some cinnamon hearts or flowers. However, watch out for the less than classy bouquets.
The absolute worst line I saw was for a flower delivery service, which offered the following line attached to a Valentine's Day bouquet: "I have a heart on for you". (shudder) There were children in this flower store! Can you imagine the misguided individual who thinks this is a sexy thing to send to his poor girlfriend?
In other helpful points:
-do not ask a women out for valentine's day if it's a first date, and you're asking less than 24 hours in advance. You look desperate and then she's creeped out and thinking that her cat would be a better date (inspired by a true story).
-single women do things in packs (ever seen just one go to the bathroom?). So if it's National Couples Day (aka Valentine's Day), it's likely that you'll see women out together enjoying "freedom". Go ahead, hit on one of them. If they're out with the girls, they're single. But don't expect too much, as they never leave their wingmen and you will go home alone.
-if you're recently singled, you will recover eventually. Feel free to indulge in whatever you need including: Ben & Jerry's (I recommend Cherry Garcia), sappy movies, bitter calls to friends, or the whole write a letter and don't mail it thing (stay away from email - you can have a horrible situation with the accidental hitting of 'send'). But never,
EVER drink and dial!
-do not whine about how you hate that you're expected to buy flowers just because it's valentine's day. Suck it up - at least you have a date! And take heart, if you were dating
me, you'd be expected to show up with flowers more than once a year.
-and finally, if you have some sort of actual relationship situation, make sure you tell the other person that you care about them (but not using any type of Heart On language).