The Curling Bonspiel (aka SWEEP!!!)

We had our curling event on Friday, which was quite an interesting experience. I've only tried it once before, and that was a year ago. I'm supposed to have curling genes, since my mom was a curling star back in the day, but I may be living proof of genetic variability because I demonstrated a lack of prowess with any sort of rock placement. Fortunately that didn't affect my enjoyment of the game. I managed to avoid any Curling Related Injuries, or CRI's (Christie, 2005), but alas, Shannon didn't escape as unscathed. Her knee is a bit of a mess, as she managed to thump it pretty badly. But that's not too horrific if you consider the fact that we were on ice chasing rocks, and wearing slippery shoe things.

The actual event was preceded by a potluck turkey dinner (the first of the Christmas season). Usually I utilize my stellar baking skills to show off, but this year I had no time, so Shannon and I elected to stop at the bakery and pick up some little cakes and tarts. They were eaten all the same, and I'll bake for our Christmas party later in the season. The little lemon ones were surprisingly good (and I envy/have sympathy for Shannon since she lives so close to the bakery, and she'll have no choice but to eat them all the time).

I learned that you have to get the rock into the house (and you can't call it a goal, an end zone, or a bulls-eye), usually bashing other rocks out of the way to do so - hopefully the other team's. Each person throws twice (give or take depending on the distractions and picture taking situation), and the most experienced person is the Skip. We elected Michael the skip, partly because he'd curled before, and partly because none of the rest of us wanted the responsibility. Not that it really mattered, because it would seem that in order for the skip to do his job, the rest of the team has to be able to land the rocks in the place that he indicated.

The player takes the rock, which weighs 42 pounds, turns it over, and dusts the bottom to remove dirt that will hinder it's progress across the pebbled ice. Now, I can understand how this would be important in competition play, but let's face it, there wasn't an ounce of skill between the four of us, so really, is a microscopic bit of dust going to make a difference here? However, you want to minimize your variables (temperature, wind speed, and dust I guess), so we all dutifully polished those rocks until they shined.

I'm told that once you push off from the "hack" you have to release the rock before the hog line (painted line on ice). This was never a problem; usually the rock was long gone by the time I got near that line. I don't know how people stay so steady on those slippery little shoe things. Michael tried to explain how to put a handle (spin) on the rock at the point of release, but I was focusing on not falling down, so the path of the rock was more or less out of my hands; it was on an adventure of it's own as far as I was concerned.

I think curling will be improved when they figure out an anti-sweep. I mean, you can sweep to make the rock go further or curl less, but you can't stop them if they're barreling down the ice with no regard for the location of the house. This wasn't a problem for Michael, who simply stopped it when it got in the house, and assigned us the points anyway. Not that there was any cheating going on.

Basic things I learned:
-If a rock doesn't make it far enough for points you pretend you meant to do it and call it a "guard"
-you're having a bad game if your skip keeps saying "good effort" or "nice try". Likewise if your team bursts into laughter when you release your rock or you fall down.
-If the rock doesn't go where it was supposed to go it is acceptable to blame: the makers of the rocks, the sweepers, the ice, your shoes, the wind speed or direction, or your busted knee.
-any shots that don't go where you want were clearly tough shots
-Definition of double: what you order at the bar after you lose
-cheating and putting rocks back that have overshot the house is always acceptable (provided it's your skip doing the adding)
-Screaming "hurry hard", "move it sweeper", and "what are you DOING?" to either the sweeper or the rock makes you feel like you actually know how to curl. But this clearly indicates to everyone else that you really don't have a clue.

Shannon, Michael, Selena and I headed out after our games (ends?) and went home to look after Angus and play some games. We played cribbage, which really excited me, since I haven't played in ages (and not with such exuberance since Meghan was here!). We called it an early night since we'd had long days, and I was fine with that as I was teaching CPR in the morning. Getting up at 6 am is never fun. So between the curling, the cribbage, and the 11:00 going home time, I found out what it was like to be about 100 years old. I have now experienced "early retirement". And sadly, it was great fun.